I'm knitting as fast as I can...

I swear, I am knitting! I'm even spending oodles of time on my knitting and I'm still stuck on this endless k1, p1 ribbing.

Who would have thought a 3" collar (and waist bit) would take this long?

I've started contemplating how I could knit simultaneously with the other things in life I do:
1) Get voice transcription software so I can "speak" my work emails and keep on knitting

2) Learn to cook foods that require a no-hands approach. I've gotten making popcorn down to a fine knitting science.

3) Knit whenever I'm having a conversation with someone, whether they understand that I'm able to pay attention to them or not... I'm testing this out tonight, but my test subject is also a knitter, so my results may be skewed.

4) Lead choral warmups with my feet. I'm sure they don't need to see my hands to know how to breathe!

5) Slack off, and watch more TV and listen to more podcasts instead of actually working, so that I have more knitting time.

6) Liquify all of my food -- no hands required if I use a straw!

7) I've already mastered reading blog posts, ravelry forums, and pdfs by scrolling with the spacebar (and any body part can hit the spacebar). Onto mastering word and excel scrolling... maybe I need one of those brain computers that was featured on House this week -- think down and the page goes down. It's worth looking into.

8) Get a new phone system so I can have conference calls on speaker phone while knitting. (Actually, this is ingenious and I should go buy a new phone this afternoon...)

9) Hire monkeys to do my daily cleaning around the apartment. I'm also finding this ingenious, but perhaps not quite as practical as #8...

10) Find a yarn-friendly workout. Somehow, I don't think rock climbing, dance classes, or zumba (Salsa-inspired aerobics) are going to go hands-free anytime soon...

Ok, ok. The main thing: spend less time on ravelry, and more time actually knitting! One inch of ribbing to go!